Ahhhh… alignment. That feeling of being in the right place, right time, right self. Do you feel this often or is the feeling of being in alignment more elusive for you? One challenge is that they way most of us have been “trained” to “solve problems,” like the feeling of not being in alignment, of life not fitting, not clicking and certainly not helping you to feel fulfilled and happy, is to focus on the problem and “fix” it.
In fact, the secret is to turn a full 180 away from the problem, or feeling out of alignment, to focus on all the ways you can get into your own personal flow. Here are four steps you can take to create a greater sense of alignment in your life.
Step ONE: Let go of feeling responsible for others.
Time is precious in your life and take note of how much of it you can spend talking about others’ problems, trying to help others, or putting yourself in the backseat because someone else “needs” you.
We are often recognized for being of service to others, for being a good friend, or helping out with a community project, etc. We are often not recognized for taking care of ourselves, slowing down, spending time doing what we love, filling ourselves up first. At some point many of us absorbed a story that people were selfish or self-centered if they weren’t busy enough engaged in the lives of others.
Here’s the secret that we now know: you have to fill yourself up first and serve others from your overflow. If you are saying “no” to what you want to do, what lights you up or makes your heart sing because you are too busy caring for others, than you are going to end up feeling depleted, stressed and even resentful.
There are two significant facts at play here: 1. You are not going to get into your own flow, your own personal alignment, trying to help others to get in flow. You can’t BE for someone else, only you. 2. If everyone in the world took care of themselves first, and others second, we would be a world full of fulfilled people. right?
So I give you permission to be self-centered. Center your life in you. Stay centered by honoring who you are and what you desire. This leads to Step TWO.
Step TWO: Create as many experiences as possible that make you happy.
What lights you up from the inside out? Where do you want to dissolve into the present moment, never to return? Do more of that! Only when you tune into and experience these elevated emotions can you allow them to guide you into alignment. If you do not know joy (have you experienced that energy lately?), you can hardly be a healthy, vibrant vibrational being.
It is not possible to follow the energy of apathy, obligation, boredom, or frustration into alignment.
Joy was given to you to signal your life’s purpose and to encourage you to continue along the path that inspires joy within you. It’s a signal that you receive in your vibrational field when you are engaged in a way that is resonant with your highest good.
The message that you are being offered in the throes of joy is, “Yes! More of this, please!” What have you always LOVED to do? And what are all the ways you can do more of that now? Climbing trees, swimming, painting, exploring, acting, building, taking things apart? It can be a simple as sitting in your favorite chair to enjoy a cup of tea, breathing deeply, thinking about those things you are grateful for, or listening to music.
Sending your attention towards anything that you love, that lights you up, is only going to create more of the same. Focusing on the “problem,” what is wrong, or not in alignment in your life will also create more of the same.
Step THREE: Make your inner child super happy.
In many traditions there is an understanding of the three selves: the higher self, the child self, and the adult self. These three selves have a line of communication. The higher self can communicate with the child self and the child self with the adult self. The adult self can ONLY reach the higher self via the child self. This is why there is so much guidance encouraging us to nurture our inner child.
Want to find your purpose? To feel in greater alignment? Play (your way.) Have fun (your way.) Do more of what makes your happy.
In those moments, you will experience alignment. The more present you become, the more you will feel in flow. In the present moment, you aren’t trying to impress anyone or avoid disappointing anyone. You are authentically you.
Here’s more good news. Say you don’t love your job. Or maybe your current relationship is less than satisfactory. You don’t have to do anything about the job or the relationship to get back into alignment. Take your focus off the source of discontent and send it towards what does feel right and inspiring in your life. The job, the relationship, will fall away, transform, or otherwise shift accordingly. Here’s to your ever-expanding feeling of being in the right place, right time, right you!
The above is adapted from Whitney Freya’s latest book 30 Days to Unstoppable, Be the Dream Made Visible. Available on Amazon.
Whitney Freya is an expert in Inspired Living, providing practical tools & practices that free your mind from limitations and scarcity to create more in your life that lights you up from the inside out. Buy her newest book, 30 Days to Unstoppable, Be the Dream Made Visible on amazon.com. Learn more at WhitneyFreya.com
